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+ servings

Mean Green Smoothie

An everything-but-the-kitchen-sink smoothie that packs a healthy punch with kale, avocado, almond milk, and dates.
How did this concoction come about? One day, I opened my fridge, took out everything that was green and blended it up with dates and almond milk. Pretty good, I must say.
I make one of these smoothies at the beginning of the week — pour myself one serving and dose the rest into ice cube trays, ready to be buzzed up at a moment’s notice.
This recipe first appeared on altonbrown.com.
Alton Brown's Mean Green Smoothie Recipe
ACTIVE TIME: 10 minutes
TOTAL TIME: 10 minutes
Yield: 4 servings


  • 12 fluid ounces almond milk
  • 6 pitted dates, quartered
  • 3 stalks celery, coarsely chopped
  • 1 lime, juiced
  • 1 small Granny Smith apple, cored and coarsely chopped
  • 1/2 English or hothouse cucumber, quartered
  • 1/2 avocado, pitted
  • 8 cubes ice
  • 1 cup kale, stems removed

Specialized Hardware

  • Blender


  • Combine all ingredients in the carafe of a blender. Begin blending at the lowest speed and slowly accelerate until you achieve a vortex. Blend on medium for 1 minute, then increase the speed to high and blend for 1 more minute. Serve immediately or pour into ice cube trays and freeze for later.